5 Things EVERY Woman Needs to Hear

What 5 Things Does Every Woman Need to Hear?

To start my research on this topic, I consulted first with a precious senior adult couple in my church.

Their names are O.C. and Amelia, and they have been happily married for a very long time.

What do women really need to hear from the men in their lives? Here are 5 wonderful suggestions that are sure to inspire and encourage women of all ages. These suggestions come from a whole group of happily married women.

Every Sunday, O.C. drives Amelia up to the front doors and lets her out while he goes and parks the car.

He carries her bags and escorts her to her ladies class.

After church, O.C. carries the bags and goes to get the car. Rain or shine, he drives up and offers her curb service after every church event.

I’ve watched them go through happy days and sad days. I’ve observed a sweetness and a deep affection in their relationship.

Recently, I asked O.C., “What does Amelia like to hear you say to her?”

He didn’t even take a breath before he blurted out, “Yes, Honey!”

I asked Amelia what he said to her that she loved to hear.

I got a little longer answer from her:What do women really need to hear from the men in their lives? Here are 5 wonderful suggestions that are sure to inspire and encourage women of all ages. These suggestions come from a whole group of happily married women.

‘He tells me, “I’m so thankful we have each other–“
I know he means he is thankful to God because I feel that towards him.  We were both older when we met, and we are still married “33” years later.
When I had colon cancer, he took care of me. To this day, even though I am in remission, he always is seeing to my care.’

Also for this post, I sent emails to 20 of my good friends who enjoy positive, healthy marriage relationships.

I asked them to tell me what they most loved to hear from their men.

I got back some wonderful responses, some very lengthy.

However, because I know that most of you are going TO READ THIS POST OUT LOUD TO YOUR MEN… I have kept my comments quite short.

I am trying to help you, sisters!

Start briefly, and only expound if necessary!

(I’m not picking on any men who are reading; I’m just trying to keep your women focused on the main things)!

Here are the 5 Things Every Woman Needs to Hear:

1) Thank you/I really appreciate you!

In other words…

Women need to know that their men see and appreciate all that they do. Click To Tweet

If you feel that your husband must hear more…

  • Remind him of a time when he thanked you. Tell him how it made you FEEL.
  • Ideas other women have shared:
    • “I really appreciate all you do, even the little things that I might not mention. I notice.” (courtesy of Heather)
    • “I couldn’t do it without you.” (courtesy of Benita)
    • “Thank you for your prayers and your encouragement.” (courtesy of Benita)
    • Just “Thank you.” (courtesy of Ginger)

2) You are so good/the best at _____. (Be specific).

In other words –

Women like know that their men think they are gifted, special, and great at certain things. Click To Tweet

If you feel that your man needs more…

Remind him of a time when he told you how good you were at something.

  • Give him an example, “You are the best cook, mom, wife, partner, friend…”
  • Ideas other women have shared:
    • My husband will say, “You are so smart! I love the way your mind works.”
    • “I’m impressed by the great work you do.”  (courtesy of Benita)

3) You look beautiful/gorgeous/amazing!

In other words…

Women need to hear from their husbands that they are still gorgeous! Click To Tweet

If you feel that he needs more detail…

Explain that you want HIM to think you are more beautiful than any other woman in the world.

  • Ideas other women have shared:
    • “You look so pretty today.” (courtesy of Candy)
    • “That dress is gorgeous on you.” (courtesy of Kendall)

4) I’m WITH you, and I’m FOR us!

In other words…

Women need to hear that their men are FOR their marriage relationship. Click To Tweet

If you feel that your man needs more explanation…

Explain how good it feels when he affirms that he is sticking with you.

  • Ideas other women have shared:
    • My husband will often say, “You are stuck with me. I’m not going anywhere.”
    • “I’m on your team!” (courtesy of Beth)
    • “I will protect our family and our marriage.” (courtesy of Beth)
    • “You’re my best friend and there’s no one I’d rather spend time with than you.” (courtesy of Debbie)
    • “Let me help you with…” (courtesy of Gina)
    • “Let’s pray together.” (courtesy of Gina)

5) I love you more today than I ever have before!

  • (He will “get” this one – I am certain)!

A few honorable mentions that I couldn’t leave out (but couldn’t decide where to fit into the 5):

“I planned this special event just for you. You don’t have to do anything. Just come with me.”

“Not many women would have stayed with me.”

“With a woman like you, Satan’s usual methods don’t work.  He has to be more sophisticated to come up with a way to get to you.” 

Now, I realize that some of your men are NOT verbal!

Many men are not.

Mine is not.

But, can I brag on my man for a minute?

Randy and I married almost 25 years ago.

When we first were dating and in the early days of our marriage, he didn’t express his feelings too often verbally.

He was more of a servant and a hugger. In other words, he expressed his love best with actions and with physical affection.

However, I need to HEAR love expressed in words.

In those early days, our differences created some challenges.

However, we learned to communicate better by reading a book called the 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman. I highly recommend this book, and you can link to it HERE.

This is what we learned to do (and now do without thinking):

When I was feeling down, Randy would reach to hug me or pat my shoulder.

I learned to say, “I need words, Honey.”

When Randy was having a hard day, I would try to use my words to encourage him.

He would quietly say, “I just need a hug.”

My husband is now very effective at expressing his words of affirmation, and I am a much-improved hugger!

What do women really need to hear from the men in their lives? Here are 5 wonderful suggestions that are sure to inspire and encourage women of all ages. These suggestions come from a whole group of happily married women.And honestly, there is NO perfect marriage or dating relationship!

None!

Nobody has it all figured out or gets along well all of the time.

But, we can always improve.

I also wrote a post like this for wives to learn what to say to husbands. You can link HERE.

The words of Philippians 2:1-4 in The Message seem so fitting:

“If you’ve gotten anything at all out of following Christ if his love has made any difference in your life, if being in a community of the Spirit means anything to you, if you have a heart, if you care— then do me a favor:

Agree with each other, love each other, be deep-spirited friends. Click To Tweet

Don’t push your way to the front; don’t sweet-talk your way to the top.

Put yourself aside, and help others get ahead.

Don’t be obsessed with getting your own advantage.

Forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand.”

I think my wise friends O.C. and Amelia have figured out the secret to a happy and long-lasting relationship–put yourself aside and put others first.

I pray that we will all more selflessly love each other.

I pray we will all try to more regularly say the things that others in our lives need so desperately to hear!

So, what do you think?

~ Did I mention your favorite thing to hear?

~ What would you add?

I always enjoy hearing from you!

*Special thanks to everyone who shared their ideas for this post: Kelly, Ginger, Shan, Debbie, Benita, Brenda, Kendall, Beth, Candy, Tami, Gina, Heather, O.C., Amelia, and all others who shared their suggestions.


**And, would you do me a favor — if this article has encouraged you today — would you share it with someone else? 

Maybe you can send it to a friend or family member?

This blog occasionally uses affiliate links and may contain affiliate links.  Melanie Redd is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com. For more on my disclosure policy, click HERE.

~ I regularly link to these AMAZING SITES~

© Melanie Redd and Ministry of Hope, 2016. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner are strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Melanie Redd and Ministry of Hope with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

About helloredds@gmail.com

Blessed wife of Randy for over 25 years, mom to two great college students, blogger, women's ministry coach, speaker and author who is amazed by God's grace-

30 thoughts on “5 Things EVERY Woman Needs to Hear

  1. Great words of encouragement! You are such a blessing…encouragement and hope spring from your writing! Thank you for another insightful and practical post!

  2. I know one thing that melts my heart Melanie, when I hear my husband bragging about me to others. He sometimes doesn’t know I ‘m listening, but I do and his words of affirmation is all I need to be reminded of what I mean to him. This was lovely – well done again on this series. Please link up to my Tuesday Talk today or all week when you can to share with others.

    1. Oh, Michelle, I love that too!

      There is something really sweet about their kindness to us, isn’t there.

      Thanks for stopping by and leaving a kind word today. I can’t wait to share your story!

      Blessings,
      Melanie

  3. next door on #RaRaLinkUp! Just love how you took the time to ask other’s what they most need to hear from their spouses! Beautiful reminders, and all so true!! My husband very often tells me these things–but during challenges, I forget just how often he does say beautiful, encouraging things! Thank you for your post!

    1. Thank you for stopping by and leaving a kind word! I appreciate you and your visit!

      And, you are blessed to have a man who tells you nice things! That is a real gift!

      You have encouraged me today~
      Blessings to you,
      Melanie

  4. I love overhearing my husband talking *about* me to other people. It’s always lovely — so complimentary — and he’s filed with pride. He says these things to me too — but it’s always lovely to hear him saying such lovely things to others too. Thanks so much for linking up with #TwinklyTuesday — hope to see you again next week! x

    Caro | http://www.thetwinklediaries.co.uk

    1. Hey Caro,

      Isn’t that fun when you hear your man bragging on you to others! I love that!

      And, thank you for stopping by to leave a kind word today. I really appreciate you and your visit!

      Hope you have a blessed day~
      Melanie

  5. I love the ideas you put forth in this post!!! I really want my readers to know about this too! I want to share this in my weekly series called “Roll Out The Red Carpet Thursday” – I share bloggers’ amazing posts that I’ve found during the week. I hope that’ ok! Have a great night!

    1. Thanks for stopping by and leaving a kind word today. I appreciate you and your visit.

      And, I will try to stop by your link – “Roll Out the Red Carpet.” Sounds like much fun!

      Hope you have a blessed day~
      Melanie

  6. At first I could not think of a time my husband said any of these things to me, but the best thing I ever heard came from someone else. They told me how proud he was of the work I am doing on my magazine. That meant alot, knowing that he was boasting to others about what I do. Followed you here from the Tell it to me Tuesdays party

    1. Hey Joyce,

      That is so cool that your husband is going around bragging on you to other people. He must be very proud of you!

      Hope you have a blessed day today, and thanks for making mine a little brighter by stopping by!

      Melanie

  7. Melanie, I love this! I’m crazy blessed by Rev. He says all those things and daily lifts me up with his words and actions. We’ve been married 43 years and we’re still best friends!

    1. Hey Deb,

      Thanks for stopping by and leaving a kind word. So grateful you are with a good man who lifts you up. You are blessed, and share a wonderful testimony!

      Hope you have a wonderful weekend~
      Blessings,
      Melanie

  8. Melanie, this is an awesome post! Loved the message that you’re sharing here! Very well written, Love! Peace and many blessings to you, sweet friend! 🙂

  9. These are good words of advice. Wives should print this out and share with their husbands! Thanks for sharing at my Grandma Ideas Sharing Time link party. I really appreciate your participation.

    1. Thanks, Jess!

      Appreciate you stopping by for a visit and to leave a kind word!

      And, I do love when I am appreciated too.

      Hope you are having a great day today.

      I’m enjoying being a part of Tuesday Talk, and I like coming to your site!
      Melanie

  10. My wife and I have been married almost 40 years. I too am a man of few words. My wife has had cancer issues for the last three years, and has 6 months to a year to live. So I sat down and wrote her, about a dream I had. It was when we first met. I still remember the first time I saw her as if it was yesterday. But the dream was about her grandmother and my father in heaven looking down on us and steering us toward one another. I never told her about the dream. She loved it and she tears up every time she reads it. Maybe you don’t always need to “verbalize.”

    1. Hey Nate,
      Thanks for stopping by to share your story with me. It sounds like your written words have really blessed your wife!
      And, sometimes the written word is even more powerful than the spoken word.
      Plus, you can read them over and over!
      I hope your wife is doing okay with her cancer. Keep encouraging her! (Sounds like you are a great husband!)
      Blessings to you,
      Melanie

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