Hey KM,
Thanks for taking the time to share your experiences.
I agree… lots of churches have lost sight of the way.
However, all is not lost! We visited a church yesterday where two young adult men gave their hearts to Christ. It was so sweet!
Keep believing in Jesus like never before!
Blessings,
Melanie

I am a saved relational Christian. I found in any building 20% of people are relational 80% are religious there for social. They bring in politics, pastor who salary is paid by giving won’t say anything. Many are Pharisees and Saducusees…the very thing Jesus was against.
I am not there to navigate all the people. I don’t was there for Life application biblical message.Whats so sad is it’s become tool of Satan. It’s purely spiritual warfare. All places have similar dynamic. There is no emphasis on seeking saving the lost. My mission field is outside of church. Food banks need contributions. I can be fed at home reading God’s word
and listen to praise music… witnesses to those whose lives need Jesus the way I did. Evangelical is different than white nationalist.

At my previous church the pastor wouldn’t talk to me. I (stupidly) admitted I was weak and asked for prayer, another time I asked for pastoral advice, both times he refused. Only certain people get pastoral care, I should have known better than to ask. The pastor would like to my wife to keep me out of the room when we had a meeting.

Since leaving the pastor heard I was attending a different church and contacted it’s leaders to discuss me. This has happened twice now. I don’t know what was said, but their demeanor changed afterwards.

Sometimes people leave when the pastor is not saved. Sometimes it’s best to let people leave your church so they can experience a Godly church.

Hey Mary Ann,
I’m so very sorry to hear this! I’m afraid this happens quite often.
I know this must be very disheartening.
As you are working through the pain, I am praying that God will lead you to a new church where you will find great joy, community, and encouragement.
Yes! It’s hard sometimes to move forward. But, I’ve seen God do amazing things on the other side of our deepest hurts.
Praying that He will especially comfort you today.
Thanks for sharing your story.
Blessings,
Melanie

Hey Paula,

It’s so good to hear from you! Thanks for taking the time to share your ideas and thoughts. You make so many good points.

And, I do agree, things have changed a great deal since I first wrote the article.

May we make Him our priority! Yes and Amen!

Blessings to you,
Melanie

1. The Bible is very clear in what the End Times will look like. Paul addresses this in 2 Timothy Chapter 3. The FIRST earmark of the terrible, last days is that people will be lovers of themselves. Narcissism is at an all-time high with people thinking and feeling that the world revolves around them, what they want, what they think and what people should do for them. This is original sin. This is exactly what Adam and Eve fell for in the Garden of Eden…they wanted to be like God, fallings for satan’s lies and tactics–nothing has changed. What we MUST care about is their eternal salvation, the only cure for narcissism is the blood of Jesus Christ.

2. With that said, if people are saying, “no one cares about me” or “I don’t fit in”, then, perhaps, they are coming to church for the wrong reasons. If we are to obey the greatest commandment, coming to church should be about God first and not self. If we love Him first, then yes, we will love others because as it says in 1 John 4:19…we love BECAUSE He first loved us.

3. Hebrews is very clear as to why we are to come to church. Hebrews 10:25 says…Let us not give up meeting together as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another–all the more as you see the Day approaching. This one verse of Scripture is power packed with the how and the why. We are to meet together (the body of believers in Jesus Christ), to ENCOURAGE one another and why? Because He is coming back soon. We are beat up, put down, fighting the world and satan’s schemes that we come to church bruised and beat up. We come to worship together corporately, to be encouraged by His Word, to thank Jesus for His shed blood, the most amazing gift God has given us and to encourage one another and build each other up as we wait for His return. Not tear each other down and point out the faults of each other. My Pastor shared with me a saying that I will never forget…”We kill our own”.

4. When people say, “no one cares about me”, they are also being very critical of others. Silently pointing fingers at people, including Pastors and leadership. Anyone in leadership knows that you cannot care about everyone, all the time, in the manner they wish to be cared about. This is simply impossible. Only God Almighty can do that. My heart breaks for Pastors who have to juggle their home life, children, their congregation, writing a sermon, making hospital visits, phone calls, e-mails, etc. Finger pointing (and we all do it because we all blame shift) is part of original sin (read what Adam and Eve said after God confronted them in their sin). No one and I mean no one can possibly care for everyone in the right way.

5. God has gifted the church with gifts, talents and abilities to serve Him and His church (1 Corinthians 12:28). A Holy Spirit, God led church will use these gifts and will work like a human body as Paul explains. “Some” are given one type of gift, talent or ability while others have other types. If everyone were to use the very gifts God has given them, instead of being so concerned about people caring about themselves, imagine what a glorious church, a well-oiled machine of God could do for His kingdom and exalt the Name of Jesus Christ if we did what God has equipped us to do.

6. Jesus was very explicit in that there are wheat and tares. Sitting among us as He explained in the parable of the wheat and the tares in Matthew 13, are unbelievers as well as believers each Sunday when we sit in the pews. It is hard to distinguish the two at times, with the exception of knowing a tree by its fruit. Sometimes you just know when someone is saved. This should encourage us that even Jesus told us that the field right before us, including on Sundays, will have unsaved people that yes, need to be reached. Why aren’t we simply starting with what God puts right in front of us and look for someone who is new, a first-time attender, talk with them, welcome them, etc., instead of going right for our friends and those we already have a connection with. As a ladies Sunday School teacher, I’m always looking for women and families who are not regular attenders to welcome them and say hello and hopefully glean why God has brought them to His house of prayer. Just a few months ago, a first time attender (woman) was sitting behind me that I struck up a conversation with her and asked her point blank what brought her to our church. She was impressed learning that our Pastor was not afraid to preach on Revelation and I asked her if she would be interested in joining our ladies Sunday School class. I even went so far as to bring her to our classroom so that next week, she would know where to go without hesitation. She’s been a regular attender to both our Sunday School class and church. She said she feels welcome and right at home. Why? Because of one conversation and taking one little step. We must remember that God brings people and if EVERYONE would just take a few moments and look around and make a point to welcome new people (the field), they would begin to see the love we are to have for one another within the church….John 13:35 identifies those who are followers of Christ…that we love one another. We must extend love to others yes and wouldn’t it be wonderful if EVERYONE in the church extended that love to others while they are right there, before us? If we aren’t doing it while in His house of prayer, of course we’re not going to do it the other six days a week. The Bible is filled with divide and conquer principles. Imagine a church with 50 people could quickly become a church of 100 people under the Word of God if everyone just welcomed, invited, talked to, etc. Everyone has the ability to do this.

7. I always feel uncomfortable with people who are finger pointers, fault finders, grumblers and complainers. First, it causes me to have to self-examine and yes, that’s a tough one, but that’s what Jesus told us to do…take the plank out of our own eye first (Matthew 7:5). It is important to ask ourselves, do I CARE about other people and their well being and why they are no longer attending the church, or am I so steeped in my own finger pointing, grumbling and complaining that I’m missing what God has set before me, caring only about myself and not others?

Lastly, I would like to share this…I know that the whole pandemic has changed so much about how we go about our lives, what to do, where we go, etc. It truly has caused us all to contemplate our priorities. God should be our priority. He is to be first, moreover His Son, Jesus Christ, Who sits at the right hand of God the Father Almighty, interceding on our behalf. His church is a blood bought church and perhaps what we have ALL lost sight of is that He is our first priority. Maybe we should simply go back to the first two of the 10 Commandments to find the answer that we all seek.

Hey James,
Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts. So sorry for the challenging things you have lived through.
Praying that you will continue to heal and experience great hope in your life.
We appreciate you stopping by,
Melanie

Thanks so much for taking the time to share your story and your thoughts.
We keep loving and honoring God. Yes!
We continue to focus on worshipping Him! This is so important!
Praying that you will feel better and be encouraged today~
Blessings,
Melanie