How to be more Relationally Healthy

how to more healthy
Share the Hope!

It’s true.

We have never been more “dialed in” or “connected” as we are today.

In just a few seconds, we can text or message anyone, anywhere. I can send a quick note to my husband or kids here locally, or I can message my cousin who lives in Sweden.

All of these messages only take a few seconds.

It is truly amazing how easy it is to talk to and keep up with others in our day. Technology has made it simple to keep in touch.

And, yet, are we feeling more connected?

Do we feel closer to people than we have ever felt before?

how to healthy

How to have more healthy and happy relationships:

Recently, I was seated in a restaurant waiting for a friend to arrive for lunch.

As I looked around me, everyone was on their cell phones. No one was talking to each other. No one was looking at each other.

Although our mobile devices make things easier, they cannot take the place of human interaction, personal relationships, and personal touch.

If you and I are to have better and happier relationships, we must get OFF OF our gadgets and talk to each other.

Could I suggest some practical ways to reconnect with the people around you?

How to have more healthy relationships:

1] Smile!

Turn the corners of your mouth up, look people in the eyes, and smile!

It’s amazing how much you can brighten someone else’s day with a smile.

And, a smile welcomes others into your world.

When you reach out with a warm smile, other people will be drawn in and want to talk to you. Smiling is contagious. Smiling is positive. And, smiling is one of the easiest and best ways to communicate and connect with other people.

“I just like to smile. Smiling’s my favorite!”

(Buddy the Elf)

Smiling is one of the easiest and best ways to communicate and connect with other people. Click To Tweet

2] Be a friend to someone.

We give to others what we need ourselves. To reach out and be a friend to someone else is the way to start a friendship. Rather than waiting for someone to initiate, we can be the ones to reach out first.

This is biblical! Luke 6:31 reminds us to, Do to others as you would like them to do to you.”

Rather than waiting for someone to initiate, we can be the ones to reach out first. Click To Tweet

3] Hug more.

Hugs are vital to human interaction and health. We need hugs (and plenty of them) to survive and to thrive.

Family therapist Virginia Satir said: “We need four hugs a day to survive, eight hugs to keep us as we are and 12 hugs to grow”.

Read more – Why does our brain need at least 8 hugs a day?

4] Say thank you and be appreciative.

Take the time to thank people for their kindnesses and generosity. Be appreciative through a phone call, text, or note.

Everyone likes to be genuinely thanked and appreciated! All of us!

Everyone likes to be genuinely thanked and appreciated! Everyone! Click To Tweet

5] Spend more time with good friends.

We are living in a day that is so busy. But, it’s still so good to spend time with those that we love.

You may have to schedule a monthly date or get-together on the calendar. Be intentional and enjoy time with your closest friends and family members.

Time with good friends encourages us, enriches us, sharpens us, and refreshes our lives.

“As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.”

Proverbs 27:17

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6] Do something nice for someone else today.

Send some flowers, write a note, take a meal, or just make a phone call.

Reach out and do something for someone else, and expect nothing in return.

Here are 99 ways to show simple kindness (in case you need some ideas) – 99 Simple Ways to Show Kindness.

7] Ask a friend how they are doing and listen to their answer.

Listening to another person is one of the best gifts we can give them. We show others such respect and value when we listen to what they are saying.

Look them in the eyes, ask how they are doing, and then give the gift of really listening. Don’t try to think of what you will say next or how you will respond. Just listen.

Lysa Terkeurst shares this great story about The Gift of Listening.

Listening to another person is one of the best gifts we can give them. Click To Tweet

8] Write a real letter to someone.

Remember the days of real letters and cards? Why not take a moment and write out a note or a card to someone?

You can express gratitude, tell them you love them or communicate how much they mean to you using the written word.

How fun it will be for your friend to open the mailbox and find a real letter inside!

“Kind words are like honey—
    sweet to the soul and healthy for the body.”

Proverbs 16:24

how to healthy photo 2

9] Invite and plan a date for you and your favorite person, spouse, boyfriend, girlfriend.

Take the initiative and plan a fun evening or outing for someone you love.

You may be surprised at how much your invitation, planning, and efforts will mean to your friend.

10] Take a selfie with a friend.

Want to laugh and make some fun memories? Act like a bunch of teens and take more selfies.

Our kids do this all the time. Why shouldn’t we! I dare you to get with one of your friends and take a whole bunch of pictures!

Our kids do this all the time. Why shouldn't we! Click To Tweet

11] Text 5 people and share a good word.

This won’t take you long at all! Come up with a nice message and send it to several people on your contact list.

You don’t have to send a long message to communicate kindness. A few words will do.

You can send something as simple as, “Thinking about you today. I hope you are having a great day. Let me know if I can pray for you about anything special.”

And, don’t do this in a “batch text.” Instead, send these notes one by one to individuals. It will mean more to them!

“Worry weighs a person down;
    an encouraging word cheers a person up.”

Proverbs 12:25

how to healthy photo 3

12] Invite a friend to lunch and pay the bill.

Yep. Pick up the phone and initiate a lunch. Then, be sure to pay the bill. Treat your friend to the meal.

13] Plan a quick trip or a getaway with a few friends.

Oh, how fun it is to take a road trip or getaway with a friend or two!

Head to a conference or a shopping weekend. Take in the sights of a big city or enjoy time in the mountains.

There is nothing quite like a few days with your favorite people to recharge, renew, and refresh your batteries.

14] Call an old friend and enjoy a long conversation.

Take the time to call an old friend and catch up. If necessary, schedule a time to talk.

Often, I will text an old friend and ask when we can set up a time to talk. Then, I will plan for an hour or so to talk with this person. I love these conversations!

15] Pray for your friends.

If you have a bunch of great friends, wonderful. Pray for these people by name. Put their names in your journal or prayer notebook and regularly lift them up to the Lord.

If you desire to have more friends, pray about this as well. Ask God to send you the best friends you have ever had.

Healthy and happy relationships don't just happen. Click To Tweet

Healthy and happy relationships don’t just happen. They take effort, planning, and work.

If we want to enjoy better friendships, we have to become a better friend.

Scripture tells us,

“A man who has friends must himself be friendly.”

Proverbs 18:24

how to healthy photo 4

So, what do you do to have better and more healthy relationships?

What suggestions do you have?

Encouraged by what you read?

Would you share this article with a friend, co-worker, or family member?

Maybe you can send it to a friend or family member?

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© Melanie Redd and Ministry of Hope, 2018. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner are strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Melanie Redd and Ministry of Hope with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

About 428 Articles
Blessed wife of Randy for over 25 years, mom to two great college students, blogger, women's ministry coach, speaker and author who is amazed by God's grace-


  1. Thank you for sharing these timely reminders! The busy, device-centered world we live in can really take a toll on our relationships if we let it. It’s so true that nothing can take the place of human interaction and time spent bonding together. Being intentional in what we do to build and maintain relationships is key. These are great suggestions to reconnect and stay connected!

  2. This is such a great list, Melanie! I’ll be sharing and doing. In fact, I made a resolution for 2018 to write my hubby one love letter per month. I’ve got to get busy today and give him January’s! Thanks for these great reminders, my friend!

    • Thank you, Beth!
      And, I LOVE the idea of writing your hubby one love letter per month. Maybe you can do a Jan./Feb. combo!
      Appreciate you and your ministry!
      Thanks for stopping by~

  3. I think I’m going to use some of these to reconnect with some friends that I do not talk to on a regular basis. Friendship is so vital these days, face to face interactions and connections. With social media, we take so much of that for granted.

    • Wonderful, Brittany!
      I hope that you will reconnect with your old friends. There is nothing sweeter.
      And, I agree – friendship is so vital these day.
      Thanks for stopping by!
      Hope you have a blessed day.

  4. I enjoyed this as many others have expressed to you. I received a card today from someone I have kept in touch with over the years. I immediately sat down and called her. We have always wrote or called more often but circumstances in her family have put a strain on her. I want to thank you for this and she said we are going to call each other more often. Love you both.

    • Hey Amelia,
      Don’t you love when you get a sweet card in the mail? What a treat!
      And, I love that you picked up the phone and called her that day!
      What a great friend! What a gift!
      Love you much,

  5. Such excellent ways to connect with others. One time, it I saw a row of prom dates waiting to be seated at a restaurant and every single one of them were texting. I find myself having to make myself put my phone away sometimes. You sure model all of the examples you gave too! Thanks for being a great friend.

  6. It’s amazing how connected yet disconnected we are. I love your practical ways to keep genuine human connection. Smiling with eye contact and reaching out to others first are sure ways to let others in. Great share.

    • I know, Lureta. Right?
      And, thanks for your kind words and for stopping by today to leave a comment.
      I love smiling too. The other day in the airport, a woman kindly smiled at me and it genuinely warmed my heart. Amazing what one kind gesture can do!
      Hope you have a blessed day.

  7. I love all these amazing pointers, Melanie! There used to a time when everyone would write letters , now it is just emoticons. I love writing letters.
    #13 is on my to-do lists under the category “SOMEDAY”

    • Thank you, Diana!
      I love letters too… to open the mailbox and find a hand-written letter is a treat!
      And, I hope you will one day do #13! Maybe sooner than later!
      Praying you will find a good deal, save a little cash, and getaway!

  8. This is such great advice, Melanie! My word of the year is, ‘savor’- and one of the areas in my life that I really want to focus on savoring is my relationships. I love what your wrote here.

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