The tears were free-flowing, streaming down her cheeks.
Her heart had been broken by the cruelty of a thoughtless person.
She was hurting.
I was hurting.
The situation was painful.
She’s my daughter – my only girl and someone had broken her heart.
5 Important Things Our Girls Like to Hear
In those quiet moments when we just sat and cried, I began to think about what I should say to her.
How should I advise her?
What could I do or say to make it less painful?
What did she need to hear most at that moment?
Over the next few moments, some wonderful words came to my mind.
I think the Lord gave me these words.
I shared them with her, and I will do so again.
(In fact, I texted these very words to her this morning!)
You likely have a daughter who also needs to be encouraged today.
Even if they are not going through heartache or a challenging season, these words still apply.
You likely have a daughter who also needs to be encouraged today. Even if they are not going through heartache or a challenging season, these words still apply. Click To Tweet
(I also wrote a post like this for boys. You can check it out HERE).
These are 5 Important Things Our Girls Like to Hear
1) You are LOVED!
Most of our girls will face times of self-doubt and insecurity.
They will go through stages when they feel clumsy and ugly and unlovable.
Indeed, they will have moments when they don’t like themselves.
They need to regularly hear these words from us:
No matter where you go, what you do, what you don’t do, or what life throws your way, we love you and God loves you. Click To Tweet
“There is NOTHING you can do to change our love for you!
There is also NOTHING you can do to change God’s love for you!
Nothing can separate you from our love or His love.”
“And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love.
Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love.
No power in the sky above or the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.”
(Romans 8:38-39)
2) You are LOVELY!
Our girls are torn down, compared, contrasted, nit-picked, and made to feel less than beautiful all the time.
Many of them struggle with doubts about their beauty, body shape, and personality.
They look at images on Social Media and feel inadequate.
Additionally, they look at actresses in magazines and on TV and feel inferior and less than those that they see.
They spend time with their friends and don’t feel as thin or as pretty as their friends.
They need to hear these words from us:
On the inside and the outside, you are truly a beautiful person! Click To Tweet
“God has crafted you with such creativity, compassion, and wisdom.
He has also blessed you with a gorgeous smile and incredible blue eyes.
You are beautiful – just the way you are.”
3) You are the LORD’s!
There will be moments when our girls will wonder how they are unique and special.
They will ask things like: What is their purpose?
Does God have great plans ahead for them?
They need to hear these words from us:
“God specially created you as a one-of-a-kind.”
You are a Grand Designer’s original – the only you on this planet. Click To Tweet
“Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex!
Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.” (Psalm:139:14, NLT)
“You have a wonderful LIFE ahead of you!”
“God has amazing plans for your life. You are His!”
“There will be setbacks, roadblocks, and detours, but you will make it through all of these things.”
4) You will always be LEARNING valuable lessons – especially in the hard moments of life!
No matter how much we try to protect and shield them from it, life is going to be hard for our girls. Our children may live through very challenging days.
There are no guarantees that our girls will grow up to be healthy, wealthy, and wise.
We need to speak the truth to them and let them know that life may be very hard.
We also need to tell them that they can grow and learn great lessons from these hard times.
They need to hear these words from us:
Some days will be challenging, but every single challenge brings you the chance to learn valuable lessons. Click To Tweet
“No discipline is enjoyable while it is happening—it’s painful!
But afterward, there will be a peaceful harvest of right living for those who are trained in this way.” (Hebrews 12:11, NLT)
“Try to enjoy the journey and don’t hurry toward the destination.”
5) Life is an adventure – meant to be savored, enjoyed, and experienced.
Try to also encourage your girls to dream, live, and explore. Life is full of great moments that they can embrace.
Our girls need to be reminded that life is a great adventure–full of opportunity.
They need to hear these words from us:
“Remember – God promises to be with you every step of the way.”
“For He, Himself has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” (Hebrews 13:5, NKJV)
“There are going to be so many great adventures ahead for you.”
“Try to enjoy them, savor them, embrace them, and live in them.”
Live your life to the fullest, enjoying these adventures He has for you. Click To Tweet
Our girls need to hear:
You are loved, lovely, and the Lord’s. You have a wonderful life ahead of you with lessons to be learned all along the way.
5 Important Things Our Girls Like to Hear
Maybe today, you need to share these words with one or all of your girls.
(Even if she is a little bitty person, she’s not too young to start hearing these truths)!
~ Maybe you need to text your teen girl or college girl and share these words with her.
~ Possibly you even need to call your grown “girl” and tell her these things today?
And, if you are a girl who NEVER got to hear these kinds of words spoken to you, may I bless you in this way: (or even if you did, you can listen in too)
Hear your Heavenly Father speak these words to you today:
1. You are dearly and unconditionally loved by Me!
2. You are lovely–absolutely beautiful–to Me!
3. And, you belong to Me! You are Mine!
4. You will ALWAYS be learning, stretching, and growing!
5. Your life is an adventure! Hang on for the ride.
Need more daughter stuff?
HOW TO ENCOURAGE YOUR DAUGHTER TO CONFIDE IN YOU
HOW TO HELP YOUR DAUGHTER PREPARE FOR PROM (AFTER YOU HAVE THE DRESS)
Were you encouraged by what you read?
Then, would you share this article with a friend, co-worker, or family member?
Or, maybe you can send it to a friend or family member?
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I’m finding these articles late in life and I have made so many mistakes that have crushed my children. After divorce (almost three years ago) I couldn’t even repair myself let alone lift my children up. Now they are 16 (daughter) and 19 (son) and I just get up every morning and try something new. The daughter won’t talk to me or come to my house and the son is just broken (his words). Im hoping it’s not to late to have a relationship with them – I’m going to try these tips (for daughters and sons) and see how we change together. Thank you for blogging this all those years ago.
Hey Heather,
I’m so glad to hear that you have been encouraged.
And, I believe it is never too late to make things right with our kids. Keep on keeping on! God is able to heal and restore – anything and everything!
“Never doubt God’s mighty power to work in you and accomplish all this. He will achieve infinitely more than your greatest request, your most unbelievable dream, and exceed your wildest imagination! He will outdo them all, for his miraculous power constantly energizes you.” Ephesians 3;20, TPT
Blessings,
Melanie
These are all such beautiful reminders friend. I think girls, young and old, are filled up with these beautiful reminders. 🙂 xoxo
Thank you, Nicki!
Sure am blessed by you!
Melanie
What a wonderful, wise and caring mom you are, Melanie! I can only imagine just how encouraged this made your daughter feel. Thank you for giving us a template for responding to our children when they encounter hurts in life. I’m pinning this now but also as often as I see it on Pinterest, my friend! Hugs to you!
Thank you, Beth!
I sure love my girl, and I pray that anything I’ve shared with her can encourage others!
Our kids do encounter a lot of hurt in life!
Grateful for you and for your encouragement!
Blessings,
Melanie
This was beautiful and I need to have my daughter read this. Just yesterday she was out shopping and two girls out of nowhere stood behind her and said “You have to be skinny to shop here” and laughed and walked away.
She was so hurt and upset that she left the store.
I gave her all the comfort I could but it is hard to combat that kind of talk. This post is definitely so timely! Thank you
Thank you, Diane!
Sure do appreciate you and your kind words.
And, I’m sorry for the way those girls spoke to her!
Praying God will encourage her heart today!
Blessings,
Melanie
You are beautiful Melanie and so is your daughter. I love love this it’s so encouraging and helpful. Thank you! You are a blessing in my life. I wished our paths would have crossed in 1989 when I had my daughter to have had this encouragement and support then. But I know God has a purpose in everything in my life I’m grateful He crossed our paths now. Blessings to you ❤️
Hey Sydell,
You are very kind!
So glad you were encouraged by these words.
And, God does have a purpose in His timing.
I’m so thankful our paths have crossed as well.
Blessings to you,
Melanie
This was beautiful and so true. What a beautiful young woman you’ve raised. I’m holding a girl right now in my heart and trying to figure out how to best share the same sentiments with her ♥ Thank you for a wonderful script of truth! ♥
Thanks, Heather!
She’s a cutie, isn’t she!
And, you will be amazed at how God will give you all that you need to give to your precious girl!
Blessed to connect with you~
Melanie
I actually only have a step son, but I have about 4 girls in my teen SS class so I felt this was just as needed for them! ♥♥
Awesome! If you are working with teen girls, you need all the help you can get!!
And, can I give you my very wisest and favorite teen SS class trick? Charm’s Blow Pops! Seems that you can’t eat them and talk at the same time!!
LOL! Very wise indeed– They’re all so bubbly-some mornings it’s like refereeing! And I feel so sorry for our one guy! But it’s so fun ♥ They keep me on my toes!
Your daughter is so pretty!
Beautiful article Emily.
Great words of wisdom you have shared here.
Blessings to you both
Thanks, Ifeoma~
She is a very compassionate and caring girl too! We are blessed to have a daughter like Emily~
And, I am blessed by your words today,
Melanie
You have a beautiful daughter! And, your words of counsel are so good — especially the 4th one. Thanks for sharing at my Grandma Ideas Sharing Time link party.
Thank you, Nina!
I appreciate you stopping by and leaving a kind word!
And, I’m enjoying being part of the Grandma Ideas.
Hope you have a blessed day today~
Melanie
you is kind, you is beautiful….who wouldn’t want to hear it? Thanks for linking up with us at Thursday Favorite Things! Blessings
Thanks for stopping by and leaving a kind word today!
Hope you are having a great weekend~
Melanie
Great advice for building up our girls and helping them know they are loved by us and by God!
Thanks, Kathryn!
Appreciate you stopping by and leaving a kind word.
Hope you have a blessed day today~
Melanie
what a kind post for your daughter 🙂
stop by for a chat ♥ http://storybookapothecary.com
Thanks, Tianna!
Appreciate you stopping by for a visit today!
Glad to connect with you.
Hope you have a great weekend~
Melanie
Great word Melanie! Yes our young girls need to hear this, but I know adult women need to hear it too. The media bombards us with such baloney. And we take it seriously?
Hey Debbie,
Thanks for stopping by and leaving a kind word today! Appreciate you and your visit.
And, I agree. The media really does bombard our girls with a lot of junk. All of us girls need to to hear these good things!
Glad to connect with you~
Blessings,
Melanie
As a “girl” of nearly 40 these words are still encouraging to my soul! Thanks for sharing them! So glad I came over from
Susan B Mead’s link up!
Thanks, Liz!
Appreciate you stopping by today and leaving a kind word!
So glad your were encouraged. All of us girls need to hear good words, don’t we!
Hope you have a great weekend~
Melanie
Thank you for your encouraging words. I love that we are all Designer originals.
Hey Michelle,
Thanks for stopping by and sharing a kind word today!
I appreciate you and your ministry! Loved the piece on knowing the difference between depression and exhaustion.
Hope you have a blessed day~
Melanie
What a wonderful post. One I will surely be sharing! So glad you wrote one for boys too 🙂 I am so glad I stopped here this morning. And by the way … you are both beautiful! Blessings!
Hey Joanne,
Thanks for stopping by to leave a kind comment. I really appreciate you and your visit.
And, you have encouraged me today with your sweet words.
I hope you will have a blessed day~
Melanie
This is so wonderful! And definitely true…all things us girls need to hear! Your daughter is talented! What a wonderful sketch. Thank you for sharing! Stopping by from the Waiting On link up.
Hey Emily,
Thanks so much for stopping by and leaving a kind word today! I appreciate you and your visit!
And, I’ll pass your compliment on to my girl. She will love hearing it~
Hope to connect with you again…
Blessings,
Melanie
All of these are so true!!!!
Thanks, Pinky!
And, I appreciate you stopping by to leave a kind word.
Hope you have a blessed day today~
Melanie
This is soooo good!! Thank you for writing it. I will definitely be saving this to refer to as my own daughter grows! Found you at raralinkup today! So glad I did <3
Hey Rachel,
Thanks for stopping by and leaving a kind word today! I appreciate you and your visit.
And, your words have encouraged me today! Glad to connect…
Hope you have a blessed day~
Melanie
It’s amazing that as parents we feel the pain, if not more of our children. Nothing worse than seeing them so upset. These are beautiful words of encouragement.
Thanks for linking up to Marvelous Monday on Smart Party Planning.
Hey Catherine,
Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment today. I appreciate you and your visit!
And, it does hurt to see our kids get hurt – especially by other kids.
I’m enjoying linking up on Marvelous Monday, and I look forward to joining again~
Blessings,
Melanie
A lovely post, I also had a very upset daughter today and I’m grateful that you shared this post, I can’t wait for her to wake in the morning to explain some of these to her. Thank you for sharing. God bless you
Thanks for stopping by and leaving some kind words today. I appreciate you and your visit~
Sorry to hear your daughter was upset today. They can get that way!
Hope she woke up much happier~
Blessing to you,
Melanie
Thanks for sharing! I’ll be saving these for future reference. 🙂
Thank you!
And, thanks for stopping by and leaving a kind word today. I appreciate you and your visit!
And, I hope you have a blessed day today~
Melanie
A great reminder! My daughter is 13 and some days I’m amazing and other days “she needs space!” This reminded me of a post I wrote last year entitled “A Blessing” http://www.noordinarydays.com/2014/11/03/blessing/
Sometimes our kids simply need a personal blessing from us. I hope the post adds to the conversation!
Oh, Girl – 13!! What fun days! I’ll have to check out your post!
And, I appreciate you stopping by to leave a kind word today!
I am blessed by you and your visit!
Melanie
We are a long way there if your kids know this. Thanks for linking up to the parenting pin it party this week.
Thanks, Helen~
I appreciate your stopping by and leaving a comment today!
And, I enjoyed linking with the parenting pin it party this week.
Look forward to connecting with you in the future~
Blessings,
Melanie
Such wonderful things, I and definitely agree, these are all things daughters need to hear, but also sons. Life is all about learning and is definitely an adventure.
liz @ sundays with sophie
Thanks for stopping by, Liz!
I appreciate your visit and your comments!
And, I’ll look forward to visiting your site and reading some of your posts!
Hope you and your family have a wonderful 4th~
Melanie
Congrats on your feature on Grandma Ideas today! Well deserved!
Thanks, Michelle!
I’m still in “way over my head” but having fun! I feel like I’m running beside one of those old playground merry-go-rounds trying to run fast enough to jump on!
Sure appreciate you and all of your encouragement!
Blessings,
Melanie
It is hard to walk through painful times with our kids, seeing their heart break. And the best thing we can do for them is to point them to the Cross for healing. We can’t take away their hurt, but Jesus can. I’d love to see your 5 L’s as a printable!!
Hey Aimee,
Thanks for stopping by and leaving a kind word today. I do love visits and meeting new friends online.
And, you are right. Jesus is the only One who can truly heal those broken places.
I like your idea of a printable. I’ll start looking into that! I appreciate the suggestion.
I hope to connect with you again soon.
Blessings,
Melanie
It’s hard to sit back and assess how to respond to our children sometimes. What do they need to hear to become loving, well-balanced adults? Sometimes it’s comfort, sometimes it’s redirection, but it’s not always the same response we might have to another adult. I really like the idea of the 5 L’s and have written them down to look at later. Thank you for sharing such great words!
Thank you for stopping by and leaving such a kind word today. I really appreciate you and your visit.
And you are right. It does seem like some days they need a little push and other days they need a big hug! I guess we need to stay prayed up so we will know which it is
Hope to connect with you again soon.
Blessings,
Melanie
Love, love!! So very true.
Here from Inspire Me Monday.
Thanks so much for stopping by and leaving a kind comment. I love visits!
And, I appreciate your kind words.
Hope to connect with you more in the future~
Blessings,
Melanie
You’re so welcome.
I think these are such important things. I don’t have a daughter but I wouldn’t hesitate to say these to my son. We aren’t a religious family but that doesn’t take away the fact that sometimes, we all just need to know we are loved. thanks so much for linking up with #TwinklyTuesday
Our kids do need to hear these positive things, no matter their age or gender. My kids are 22 and 20 and I still tell them these things regularly.
I do have a post for boys that you might like. Here is the link: http://www.melanieredd.com/?s=every+boy
Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment. I always love hearing from new friends!
And you took time to photograph her misery and invaded her privacy by publishing it on your blog?!
No. That’s not her. I’m not that cruel.
That’s a stock photo. She’s 20 years old
Saving these for my daughter! Thank you so much and thanks for sharing at Thursday Favorite Things!
Thank you! Love those daughters! They are precious to their moms
This is so true! I especially resonate with number 4. When I have a daughter one day, I hope that she learns that even the hard moments and the hurtful people that we meet can bring valuable lessons into our lives. I’ve definitely learned that.
Thanks for stopping by and leaving a kind word! I always enjoy visits from friends – especially new ones!
It does seem that we learn the MOST through the tough times, doesn’t it. I wish the opposite was true.
And, I hope you will have many daughters in the future! They are much fun!
Blessings to you, and thanks for blessing me~
Melanie
Hard things to hear/believe when you are hurting BUT THEY ARE TRUTH. I’m a grandma and I’ve said these very same things to my three adult kids and now my two grandchildren. Eternal Truths. Great post – I’m your neighbor #44 at WWI today.
Thanks for the kind words today! Truth is hard to say, but it’s good to say, isn’t it!
I hear that those grandchildren are much fun! We aren’t quite there, but I look forward to the day!
And, I look forward to reading some of your posts~
Blessings,
Melanie
Having three daughters and having lived through many a tears … these are a great encouragement for young and old. Love once again your heart for God and for others.
Hey Michelle,
Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment today. I really do appreciate it when people come by for visits!
And, 3 daughters is a lot of girls! They are so fun, but they have such drama, don’t they!
I’m enjoying getting to minister alongside you, and I look forward to getting better acquainted~
Blessings,
Melanie
Beautiful reminders! Thank you for sharing with us at Waiting on…Wednesday!
Holly @ http://www.iwillservewhileiwait.blogspot.com
Thanks, Holly!
I appreciate you stopping by and leaving a nice word~
Melanie
Sarah and I read your blog together this morning and it blessed us both! Thanks for sharing
with us , we love you!
Hey Christy and Sarah,
Thanks so much for stopping by and leaving a message. Grateful you did!
And, I’m glad you read the blog and were blessed. You girls are a great mom and daughter pair!
Love you much and hope you have a fabulous day today~
Melanie
I need to do this today! Thank you Melanie for this sweet reminder.
Thank you, Carol~
I need to be reminded as well to use my words to bless my kids!
Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment. Hope you have a wonderful day today!
Wonderfully simple…Amazingly powerful…thoroughly Biblical!
Another very practical post! Thank you!
Thank you, Randy!
You sure do have a daughter who adores you!!